The Tings Tings “That’s Not My Name”
For whatever reason, I am not a fan of nicknames, especially for myself. They’re actually a big pet peeve of mine. Granted, some full names are ugly, awkward or just weird sounding but I’d still generally prefer to use them. If you like your nickname, that’s great. Let me know what to call you and I’ll do my best to remember. But don’t assume I care for mine.
I have always hated being called Tiff. As a child, the name just sounded dumb. I felt I should twist my hair around my finger and pop some gum. Now, I don’t think every Tiff is stupid, silly, whatever. I just personally preferred to be called by my full name. My parents named me Tiffany and I like it. In elementary school, it bothered me so much that the boys would call me Tiff, wait for me to get mad and yell Fanny. Okay, okay. It was pretty clever. Moving on…
Nicknames are innocent enough but I always found it interesting that people naturally assume you’d prefer to be called by a nickname of their choosing. The most common nicknames are short for whatever your “real” name is. Others are based on your personality or some shared event. Okay, okay. They can be terms of endearment BUT I still don’t feel anyone who meets me can/should feel comfortable enough to assume anything about me, like what I’d like to be called. This might all have something to do with the unattractive nicknames I’ve been given in the past like Urkelina on the junior high volleyball team but still. Anyway, I can’t help that one. I was tall, skinny, awkward with glasses and no one could remember that Steve Urkel’s cousin was actually named Mrytle…
The nickname assumption bothers me more in the workplace. Maybe it’s because I’m more concerned with being taken seriously or because I’m not always feeling automatically friendly in the office. Either way, I always notice it there. I generally don’t say anything because it’s not worth the drama but I notice. I generally like to call people whatever name they use to introduce themselves. Another good rule to follow in the office is to call people whatever name they use to sign their emails. If you’re nickname is just a respectable shortening of your real name and not some character assessment like “Smiley”, you should be fine. If you’re Fredrick and say Fred, Fred it is. But if you’re Angelica and don’t sign Angel or Angie, Angelica it is. I just ask that people follow that same rule with me. But I realize that might be asking too much (especially since I have a tendency to over-think these types of things) so I’ll just continue getting used to Tiff. If I don’t correct you or slightly grimace, you’re probably safe.
That’s not my name,
Jo’van
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The Truth: According to Jo'van 
Can I still call you Tiff? Or do you prefer Tiff Treat? He. Or can I continue using the Spanish pronunciation, aka Erwin-style, Tiffaaany? Besos mi Tiffany.
Hmmm. Where to begin? Well, I’ll probably share more about me because of that human compulsion to relate to convey whatever is running through my head at the mo’. darn human compulsion.
I’ve had a lot of nicknames. You’re shocked. I know. Many negative or ones I didn’t like (I got picked on quite a lot 4th grade thru junior high with associated nicknames. ick) and a solid handful that I like or even love/adore. I’ve even had a friend’s mom call me by one of the nicknames I did like, which is kinda sweet. The interesting thing is, if someone can truly pronounce my name correctly and say my name in a sweet voice or in a voice I just like hearing, it gets me warm and fuzzy inside and beats almost all nicknames with the exception of one or two nicknames. “Vassi” (pronounced vah see) is one of my shared event nicknames which I only ever want 3 people (mom, dad, and sister) to use.
Nicknames do not belong in the workplace in my opinion either. one of my bosses goes by Rob but I cant imagine ever pushing to call him Robby. I wouldnt want to be called “Subs” or “Subi” let alone “Suave” in the workplace just because I’m trying to look professional and those names seem too comfortable and almost reduces your respect level or stature in that context.
I do have a friend that prefers Bradley to Brad, tries to make a point of keeping it that way but inevitably gets called Brad. One of his good friends went further and started calling him B-Rad which sounds unforgivingly stupid which he hated but eventually embraced. Yes he was caucasian.
Respectfully avoiding Tiff, striving to avoid T Diddy, and liking saying Tiffany anyway,
Subhash
p.s. immitation/mockery is the sincerest form of flattery.
p.p.s. T. diddy will possibly sneak out in goofy moods
p.p.p.s. Jaleel White makes a very ugly woman.
p.p.p.p.s. I’m on track for a guinness record
p….just kidding