Shades of Understanding: John Mayer’s White Supremacist Dick

He’s douche-baggiest single to date….

John Mayer has been in the news lately.  Instead of dating another tabloid-worthy Hollywood blonde, he’s speaking with PlayBoy and performing an ill-advised brain dump.  Now, I’m a John Mayer fan.  I know that he comes off as, and probably is, a royal douche bag.  But what can I say?  I like his music.  Much like Robin Thicke, he’s a guilty pleasure I feel no need to defend.  I’ll just politely change the music if someone doesn’t care to listen to him whine in my car.

Unfortunately, John Mayer is one of the many recent celebrities who believe and, more importantly, who reporters and fans believe should be heard.  Everyone has an opinion, famous or not.  With the ever-expanding array of access points to celebrities, we learn more than we may need to about our favorite pop stars, rappers, actors and athletes.  Some know how to just be good at what they do without sharing the details of their personal lives (for example Beyonce).  While others attempt to revive dead careers by allowing us access to EVERYTHING (for example Bret Michaels).  Either way, as the fans/consumers, we have to decide just how much we care.  John Mayer’s latest interview reminds me why it’s best to just appreciate the music.  I don’t need to necessarily appreciate the person.

The only reason I paid any attention to this interview was all of the drama following it.  Aside from sharing unsavory details about his obsessions with porn and masturbating, interesting comments about exes and unnecessarily using the N-word to justify a hood pass, John Mayer is apparently not interested in sleeping with black women.  Shocking, I know!  But who cares?   As a black woman, I’m not all that interested in sleeping with him either.  My heart’s not broken.

PlayBoy: Do black women throw themselves at you? 

Mayer: I don’t think I open myself to it. My dick is sort of like a white supremacist. I’ve got a Benetton heart and a fuckin’ David Duke cock. I’m going to start dating separately from my dick.

I’m not trying to downplay the possible connotations.  Maybe John is a racist.  Maybe he considers his overworked dick too good for a little chocolate.  While eliminating the possibility of a fruitful relationship with a “sista” is unfortunate, it’s not innately wrong.  As long as John sees no problem with other people doing it, he’s completely entitled to his preferences.  If I were to say I prefer black men over white, does that make me a racist or just aware of my preferences?  Somehow I feel Usher wouldn’t be shunned for saying he prefers to date black women…

When probed by the reporter, John admits that he has found some black women attractive.

Mayer: I always thought Holly Robinson Peete was gorgeous. Every white dude loved Hilary from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And Kerry Washington. She’s superhot, and she’s also white-girl crazy. Kerry Washington would break your heart like a white girl. Just all of a sudden she’d be like, “Yeah, I sucked his dick. Whatever.” And you’d be like, “What? We weren’t talking about that.” That’s what “Heartbreak Warfare” is all about, when a girl uses jealousy as a tactic.

Funny.  I don’t know if that statement is more offensive to black women or white women.  I wonder how he thinks a black woman breaks your heart.  And are all white women manipulative bitches?  Oh John, it may not be that chocolate’s your problem.  You just might like people as immature as you are.

When this interview came out and all of the SHOCKED responses started, I thought there had to be more to this story.  I don’t regularly read PlayBoy articles so I had to look it up.  After reading the entire article, I was more bored and annoyed than offended or outraged.  I understand why these shocked responses about racial comments came out.  Aside from describing a generally goodie two-shoes ex as being sexual napalm, there really wasn’t anything else all that interesting to mention.  John Mayer seems like an intelligent person who attempts to balance sounding important and indifferent.  Somehow he generally manages to just sound like a douche.

What I found more interesting was his description of “being black.”  As a black person, I don’t know if I can describe being black.  Sure, I could spout out historical facts and statistics, but I really feel it’s about experiences related to those facts and stats.  Thank goodness John Mayer could explain it to me.

Mayer: What is being black? It’s making the most of your life, not taking a single moment for granted. Taking something that’s seen as a struggle and making it work for you, or you’ll die inside. Not to say that my struggle is like the collective struggle of black America. But maybe my struggle is similar to one black dude’s.

I’m happy you realize your struggles aren’t necessarily equivalent to ours, John.  Very happy.  Now tell me about being Latino or Asian…

Let me state for the record, “I don’t understand why any man would not be attracted to black women.”  We come in all shapes and sizes, features and attributes.  It’s a pity any man would deny himself the love a good black woman but if that’s what he so chooses to do, the fault is on him.  There are plenty of men, black, white and other, who can appreciate our beauty.  Why should we care about John Mayer’s lose?

(Plus, he’s just young and naive.  Everyone knows black women age exceptionally well.  For the most part, our skin stays taut.  Fewer wrinkles, fewer apparent birthdays.  Black don’t crack, baby.  AND we don’t have to tan.  This beautiful bronzed look is year-round, free and natural.  🙂 )

Not feeliing slighted by John Mayer in the least,

Jo’van

The World…As I See It: JT Objectifying Black Women, Really?

I read an interesting article on SoulBounce.com a few weeks ago that has stuck with me.  In “How Can Justin Timberlake Still Objectify Black Women and Get Away with It?, the author is frustrated with what he/she sees as a trend, Justin Timberlake continually objectifying black women.  The title threw me off guard and I had to read it.  I get that Justin Timberlake has embraced and capitalized on aspects of black culture but to single him out as objectifying black women just seems odd.  In my opinion, Justin Timberlake hasn’t done anything a number of African-American artists haven’t done a hundred times.  And yes, I realize there are certain things that are not socially acceptable for people of different races to copy but surrounding himself with sexy, scantily clad ebony beauties is not comparable to uttering the N word.

A passage from the post:

“From behind a wry smile and with his hair faded he actually tarnished a reigning, Black Pop star’s image arguably beyond repair by exposing her breast on national television and then built his street cred further by bringing sexy back, Middle Passage style. He’s transitioned from the post-racialist’s pop culture dream of somewhat harmlessly lusting after beautiful Black love interest in the video for “Like I Love You” into something more sinister. He uses the scapegoat of S&M edginess in which he is the aggressor, the dominant force, to subordinate his object of desire when she is Black.

He distanced himself from those undertones in using shackles (why not a different two syllable kinky word like handcuffs, Justin? Or latex, like the piece you tore off of Miss Jackson?) and whipping in the song by making himself the slave, and in the video by making lusty faces with a White woman. But all of the soft edginess and ambiguous sexism and racism has become the central M.O. for him in the video for “Love Sex Magic.”

Maybe it’s just me but I don’t get it.  Janet Jackson and Ciara are grown women.  The infamous wardrobe malfunction, if planned, has to be as much Janet’s fault as it was Justin’s.  While he could have taken more of the blame, it was her breast and therefore her final decision.  And if it was in fact an accident, what more could he say than “I’m  sorry.”

“Love Sex Magic” is a very typical music video.  Justin and Ciara slink around and imitate sex while dressed.  Yes, the opening scene features the silhouette of Justin pulling on a chained Ciara.  But for some reason, I didn’t immediately jump to slavery. It might have been the fact that I saw a preview for the video a week earlier that featured just Ciara dancing around in a tiger print full body leotard performing stripper like acrobatics on multiple poles.  The chain, while in bad taste, does make sense as the video progresses.  She’s a sex kitten that wants to be tamed by someone equally sexy, not a mulatto house slave in search of a modern day master.

“Love Sex Magic” is Ciara’s video.  While Justin is the bigger star, she had to have had a bigger say in how the video would appear.  She’s the one that’s half-naked and giving the Pussycat Dolls a run for their money on the pole.  If she agreed to the chain, why aren’t we questioning her judgement as well as his?

Another passage:

“Yes, Ciara is grown and autonomous. So is Janet. But that just makes his ability to exploit their collaborations to the point that they are subjugated to his dominance, wittingly or not, more protestable.”

Does he really have that power?  Is he that convincing, sly, manipulative?  Or are we just looking for another scapegoat?  What makes Justin so special?  His bank account or his skin tone?

This blog post garnered so much interest that the author and editors of the site hosted a roundtable to ” dig deeper and officially claim ownership of our position.”  That discussion can be found HERE.

There are definitely issues we have with the image of black women in entertainment but I don’t think Justin Timberlake should be our target.  He’s simply bought into the hype and found a way to make it work for him.

Shaking her head,

Jo’van

You be the judge.

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