Cheesy pop wedding song. 98 degrees are one of my guilty pleasures. White boys on Motown? Come on. I HAD to love them. This wasn’t one of my favorite songs but it works…
98 Degrees “I Do (Cherish You)”
I attended a lovely wedding with a friend this weekend. A quick and simple 25 minute ceremony on a hotel lawn followed by a 5 hour dinner-DJ-dancing reception. The bride looked flawless and the groom looked so happy you just wanted to pinch his cheeks. The grandmas were precious and the mandatory crazy aunt seemed to never leave the dance floor. Classic rock, country, hip-hop, r&b and swing played throughout the night. Wonderful hors d’oeuvre, a delicious dinner, ooh la la pear mojitos to die for. The only thing that could’ve made the whole event better for me would’ve been knowing who the hell these people were.
Aside from my date, Chivis, I knew absolutely no one at the wedding. Leading up to the event, I thought this small fact would be an issue. It turns out that a stranger’s wedding might be the most interesting type to attend. But let’s be clear, I didn’t crash. I was a plus one. 🙂
Normally, when you attend a wedding, you’ve previously known the bride, groom or couple. You have some funny little story about her or an embarrassing photo of him You’ve witnessed some part of their personal and relationship-based trials. You’ve been to one of their apartments or parents’ homes. You’re happy (hopefully) for them because you know what they’ve been through to reach this point. However, when you don’t have any of this background, you don’t need the because. You’re just happy for them.
Her dress was gorgeous. Cool. I’m happy for them. He was on the verge of tears. Sweet. I’m happy for them. Their parents looked so happy. Wonderful. Happy for them. The food was good, DJ on point, string quartet amazing. Happy, happy, and happy.
It was a lot like tuning into a movie that’s been on for a while. You know the wedding scene mean they’ve been through some “things” and persevered but you’re not at all that concerned with the details at the moment. Instead, you want to get caught up in the beauty and hopeful happily ever after. After all, wouldn’t you hope that’s what a stranger would think or feel on YOUR wedding day?
Anyway, as I watched this abstract couple and all of their family and friends celebrate the fact that they’re “sinners who’ve chosen to dedicate themselves to each other” (paraphrased words from the pastor, no joke), I start to consider my own wedding (if). All I can see is the color scheme: black, white and red. (If you’ve ever been to my apartment or spent significant time with me, that can’t be surprising.) I think black and white weddings and classy and simple but I’d still need a little color. But aside from the colors, I’m at a loss. Destination or hometown? Big or small? Church or hotel? Inside or outside, summer or fall, intimate or a celebration? I have no idea and have never spent the time or energy to fantasize about it.
We’ve always been told that girls plan their wedding days from an early age. Sure, I had my Wedding Day Barbie and matching Ken doll growing up. But to me, her wedding dress was nothing more than a white version of the pink ball gowns I already had. In fact, Ken’s tuxedo was more memorable because it was gray and I thought that was odd. In my head, Barbie and Ken were already married so why make a big deal about the day now? I’d quickly move onto wanting Beach Barbie and Dancer Ken (or whatever was in that Christmas’ Toys ‘R Us catalog). My dream was to be a singer, not a wife. (I understand you could do both but when you’re day-dreaming as a child, you can only focus on one thing at a time.)
Now, I don’t mean to sound anti-weddings. I fully support dream weddings and marriages. I think they’re both wonderful and something to hope for (if that works for you). But I’ve just never been in the mindset to plan my own. Rest assured, if it ever happens, I will allow it to consume my every waking moment and turn into a prime candidate for an episode of Bridezilla All-Stars. Bridesmaids beware. Haha. I think I’m just practical enough to not get that caught up (yet). I have to take baby steps like… dating. In the meantime, I’ll enjoy the anonymity and easy emotion of stranger’s weddings in person (or onscreen).
Laughing at Bridezillas (while I can),
Jo’van
The Truth: According to Jo'van 