Eye of the Beholder: Embracing the -ER

I’ve always prided myself on being -er.  I’m not the thin, pint-size ideal woman.  I’m tall-er and don’t need a ladder to reach things on the top cabinet.  I’ve never been petite and feminine.  I’m bigg-er and can carry the heavy groceries.  I hope to never feel the need to play dumb for a man (or authority figure for that matter).  I’m okay – and rather enjoy – being smart-er.  Bigg-er, tall-er, smart-er, whatever.  I’ve embraced the -ers in my life.  Good or bad, they’re there and show no signs of changing anytime soon.  In that teenage period of “discovering myself”, all I really saw were the -ers.  They seemed to be all there was to me.  I had to define them or let them define me.

As I grow old-er, wis-er, the -ers become less of comparisons to others and more of titles.  Instead of -er than someone else, I am simply an -er.  Sing-er, writ-er, listen-er, lectur-er, runn-er, fight-er, learn-er, teach-er, lead-er, follow-er, and increasingly happi-er.

Not every -er is positive and that’s okay.  For the rest of my life, I expect to change and grow.  Things that were once sources of pride will eventually embarrass me.  Things that meant nothing will later mean everything.  That’s all fine.  I’m just beginning to accept all of my -ers and what they say about the person I am today.  Don’t like the way an -er sounds?  I guess it’s time to work on it.  Realizing a problem -er has to be my first step.  I think I’ll have to start with something easy like being a shopp-er.  (Oh wait, that’ just because of lent….)

What’s your problem -er?

Labeling herself before anyone else can,

Jo’van

Office Appropriate: Discovering What You Want to Be When You Grow Up

Economic times are hard.  Unemployment rates are rising.  Salaries are being cut.  Benefits limited.  Everyone with a job is grateful and scared.  What if I’m next?  This may not seem like the best time to re-evaluate your career choices.  But it may in fact be just that.

1.) Staffs are shrinking but demands are not necessarily following suit.  As you say your teary-eyed goodbyes to pink-slipped colleagues, the stacks of paper on your desk or emails in your inbox are undoubtedly growing.  There is unfortuantely no mourning period in corporate america.  Are you skilled enough to meet these new responsibilities?

2.) Are you motivated enough to fulfill your new duties?  Skill does not always make a person feel fulfilled.  It may be nice to have your capabilities recognized and trusted but are you happy to be doing whatever it is you’re now doing.  Do you take this increased level of required work as a sign of upper management’s faith in your abilities or just the easiest way to pass the work along?  While it’s important to note how this promotion of sorts could be viewed as a good thing it’s also important to note how you feel about this new situation.  If you’re unhappy, it’ll show, no matter how good your work is.

3.) If heaven-forbid, you’re unhappy with your new situation, what can you do?  Is this the time to make demands or push back on upper management?  Is this the time to look for another position?  These are very personal questions.  The only suggestion I can make is do the best you can until you decide.  This is not the time to half-ass anything.  Not only will you increase the possibility of you being the next teary-eyed, surprised, pink-slipped colleague but you also piss on any of the recommendation letters you may need in your future job search.  Everyone’s depressed right now but an employee that intentionally makes the situation worse cannot expect assistance.  Regardless of whether you care, continue to serve your clients and company at 150%.

Discovering what you want to be when you grow up is something we all struggle with.  I personally don’t know what I want to be but I’m getting glimpses of what I may want to avoid.  Who knows where I may be in 5 years.  But in 2009, I have every intention of working my ass off for my current employer.  I need to make them feel they need me as badly as I need them (and their paycheck) right now.

Thankfully employed,

Jo’van

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