The World…As I See It: “Encore” – Music to My Ears

Searching for the perfect song for this post I stumbled upon this jewel.  You can decide for yourself if she’s honoring or poking fun…

Aretha Franklin impersonating Mavis Staples, Gladys Knight and Diana Ross

http://youtu.be/Y2IxoEE5ySY

Last night, I had the good fortune (and nearly available funds) to see ARETHA FRANKLIN in concert!  It/she/the band was awesome.  Sure, she’s older (69) and possibly still ailing (unexplained surgery nearly a year ago) but she is an undeniable DIVA!!!  Her voice is still a force to be reckoned with and she has no problem owning her stage.  She brought us up, down, closer to the Lord, into bed with a lover and out of a tough situation all in an hour and a half.  About to two-thirds of the way through, Aretha sat down at the piano.  Shocking, I know.  Like most from her era, singers were also expected to be musicians and/or songwriters.  Basically, Aretha did what few “singers” today can do – actually PERFORM.  There was no dancing or light shows, costume changes or theatrics.  She sang, the band played and the audience cheered.  So simple, so raw, such a lost art…

2011 has been the year of the diva in Austin.  Gladys Knight (calm and smooth delivery on a stool), Diana Ross (5 costume stages and vocal flair) and Aretha Franklin (turn the AC off, okay now turn it back on and put my purse under the baby grand) have all stopped by.  If you want to extend it to the men, Smokey Robinson and Stevie Wonder have also graced us with their presence.  Sadly, Smokey’s ticket prices were beyond my financial capabilities but the other king and queens of classic R&B and soul were phenomenal.  As a music fan/lover/obsessor, nothing’s better than seeing your idol(s) in their element – live.  I think we often forgive our contemporary stars’ raw vocal talents (or more appropriately, lack of) for radio-friendly songs and eye-catching imagery.  I believe we’re missing the point – Music is supposed to move you and singers are supposed to remind you why you should only sing in the shower…

As you may know, I am an amateur songstress.  I would NEVER compare myself to the music giants mentioned above.  Their talents are undeniable while mine are more subjective.  BUT my baby skills have largely been influenced by these masters of their crafts.  They influenced both me and my more contemporary influences.  Despite cramped seats, late starts, no A/C at the request of the artist and menacing storm clouds at an outdoor concert, each simply delivered.  I was in awe and so happy I didn’t miss the opportunities to see these music greats live.

At these and most concerts I attend, there’s an “Encore” period.  Yes, this is pretty standard.  (However, I’m secretly waiting for the show when the artist doesn’t come back out and we just hear the tour bus start up or the crowd agrees to remain silent just to see what happens…)  I realize this extended applause and chanting for the artist to return to the stage is something everyone just expects now but I can’t imagine that not being the most fulfilling sound for an artist.  (Sure, “I love you”, “I do”, and “Dada” are great but I mean professionally.)  In my limited music career (ha, I wish I could really even call it that), applause is the sweetest sound imaginable.  (Maybe ca-ching or “and the Grammy goes to” would sound better but…)  I’ve never sung because I considered myself to be amazing but because I love creating (or interpreting) and sharing.  It may not be good but it’s mine.  And if you think it’s good, we can love each other.  🙂

I may be a bit strange (shocking) but I’m rarely nervous before I perform.  I do my best to stay calm and indifferent.  “Well, if I do well and they like it, that’s great.  If not, oh well.”  I imagine that attitude is both a result of trying to reassure myself and reminding myself this is not my career.  While, I had fantasies as a child (teenager/20-something, let’s just be honest), I knew the chances were slim to none anything would come of it.  So I never really pursued it and stayed “realistic”.  I got a four-year degree in something (at least a little) more secure and entered the general workforce.  The most creative thing I do now is… Actually, I’m at a loss in my current job but whatever.  My job is a relatively standard desk job.  I’m not really creating anything or connecting with anyone on a level beyond the 9 to 5.

But when I sing, I do.  I can see people reacting to the music their hearing.  If it’s a cover, you could hear “Oh yeah” and “I love this song”.  They then listen to see if I do the song (or the original artist) justice.  When it’s original, the connection is harder but not impossible.  In the end, if they like it, they’ll let you know.  It’s a simple, potentially brutal, process.  If you like me, make noise.  If you don’t….crickets.

I don’t think any manager, customer, colleague or attendee could thank me in a way so deeply impactful as cheering.  (And I’m not hoping applause becomes a standard way to show appreciation in cubicles…) “Good jobs” are greatly appreciated and not to be shunned.  But you applaud a musician because you appreciate their natural skill (sure it can be honed and perfected but it’s natural nonetheless) and want to thank them for sharing it with you.  Maybe it’s counter-intuitive but there’s something about being thanked for a natural skill, as I see them to be more intimately connected to who you are, than for an ability, that’s been learned.  That’s probably weird.  Oh well..  That awkward moment between the start of you final note and possible applause is the exact moment my nerves come flooding back, minutes, hours or days worth.  That final exhale could bring me to my knees if I let it.  Thank God for standard, polite applause.

Needing Patti and Chaka to tour soon,

Jo’van

The World…As I See It: Alas, An Idol I Am Not

Enjoy the musical stylings of someone I just saw in concert but doubt would be chosen by American Idol either.  (Not that I’m comparing, just saying)

Corinne Bailey Rae “Closer”

This week I auditioned for Season 10 of American Idol.  (I couldn’t believe it’d been 10 years.  I must confess I can only remember 7 of the 9.  Is that bad? Oh well…)  The process is simple (an initial cattle call with the producers) and very early( I had to be in line by 5 am.  I only see that type of morning by accident).  Anyway, after waiting for 7 hours, I was told I would not be the next American Idol.  There was the initial pang of disappointment but then I picked up my purse and started to move on (figuratively and literally, it was a cattle call after all).

Being told you’re not good enough should have more of an impact if you really wanted something, right?  Sure, being a part of American Idol would’ve been a dream come true but for some reason I wasn’t all that surprised and therefore not all that disappointed.  I hadn’t really been able to envision myself in Hollywood, meeting Ryan Seacrest and trying to make teenagers and middle-aged moms simultaneously fall in love with me enough to text in votes.  It just sounded like something I needed to do.

(Plus, I may have just set myself up.  I chose to sing “My Funny Valentine.”  It’s a great song but since my valentine this year turned out to be a bust, I may have still had that bad energy around the song…. Just a thought.)

I love music.  Nothing moves me as much as sounds.  Words alone have minimal power.  And while images can be beautiful, nothing can twist or fill my heart as much as a good song.  And I pretty much love it all.  While r&b and jazz are what I listen to the most, I can appreciate a good country, rock or classical song.  I like to mix it up.  Borrow my iPod someday and you’ll understand.  Give me something new to learn about.

However, my love for music never fully translated into loving to be a performer.  I love singing.  I enjoy being on stage and hearing my voice over a PA system.  But that’s never been what I missed.  I’ve missed hearing all of the sounds meld.  I miss performing with a band.  I miss almost getting distracted by the bass line and missing my cues.  I miss forgetting there’s a crowd or audience and vibing with the other people on stage whether it was with a viola in my hand in orchestra, donning a robe in choir or 4 inch heels at a club with a band.

I also love writing.  It’s not necessarily the process that I love because I don’t really have a process.  Some songs start and never get finished while others are completed in two hours.  However, I think it’s cool to hear other people sing what you wrote.  They can styilze it as much as they want but in the end the song is mine, my words.  That’s kind of a cool feeling, I must admit.

And I’m also good.  I know we’re all supposed to be somewhat humble but I’ll accept that amongst other things, singing is a talent I possess, a talent I was given.  Unfortunately, I never felt pushed enough to really hone my skill.  Instead, I relied upon what came naturally and easily.  If I can be good without practicing, who needs to be amazing?  That kind of attitude probably has something to do with not being chosen.  But I don’t care how amazing you are, it’s hard to display that in 5-7 seconds.  I need to warm up.  🙂

Regardless, music is a part of me but being famous may not be in the stars.  And that’s just fine.  Despite having a certain level of talent, I never really had the desire.  Fame is great and I’m not knocking it.  If I had the opportunity, I’m sure I’d jump.  But while it’s not a reality and I can be happy that my career does not depend as heavily on what I can do as what I look like.  Hair, make-up, personal trainers and plastic surgery do not help me do my job.  I think that’s often more important than the talent in music nowadays.  I accept that American Idol is not meant for me.  But at least I tried, I can’t complain if I don’t try, right?

Plus, I refuse to believe I wasn’t good enough.  I just wasn’t what they were looking for.  That has to be closer to the truth.  Haha.

On to the next adventure,

Jo’van

The World…As I See It: Auditioning for Life

Whitney Houston’s “Saving All My Love for You”

So I auditioned for a singing contest last weekend.  So far I’ve made it through the auditioning process and am on to the 12 week contest.  Whoo hoo!!!  We’ll have to see what happens.  How knows?  I could win and be discovered.  Haha.  Sure, R&B/Pop would be the obvious choice but I’d really love to be the first successful black female country singer.  What?  I’m from Nashville and I could make a career on ballads rather than abs.  Plus, Hootie made it work.  (a.k.a. Darius Rucker).  Anyway…

I’ve been singing nearly my entire life.  Seeing as saying my entire life would be impossible.  Thanks to my grandmother being my normal babysitter, I was 5 years old sitting next to her in the adult (a.k.a. old lady) choir singing “Amazing Grace” with the full vibrato of a 60-year-old woman.  At age 7, I left the rest of the little kids playing barn animals in the Christmas play at church to sing a duet with the 14-year-old angel.  (No, seriously, I got up in my pink footy pajamas for which my mother had made matching ears and a tail to sing with the “Oh so cool” teenager.  The things you remember from childhood.  And the funny part was that I had a better voice than her.  Haha.)  Singing Whitney Houston’s “Saving All My Love For You” in a 6th grade talent show.  The mother of a classmate who’d rapped Coolio’s “Gangsta’s Paradise” told me I had a pretty voice but that my song was completely inappropriate.  Funny, right?  Going from 1st soprano to tenor in the high school gospel choir because we didn’t have any guys.  Being the 1st and 4th Cyclone Idol.  Haha, a freshman journalism major beat senior vocal majors.  Etc.  You get the point.  I love to sing and seem to be pretty good at it.

This “natural talent/gift” has always been a source of pride for me.  Sure, there are always going to be people who are better than me but they’re not always that easy to find, not like those who are smarter or prettier.  Singing was always the one thing that made me special.  Not in a way that justified my existence but just enough to make me smile a little.

The weird thing about me performing live is that I don’t really get nervous…until after.  I’m confident, almost indifferent.  It’s just singing.  I probably seem pretty bitchy about the whole thing.  That is until I’ve finished the song.  As soon as I finish that last note, the awkward pause of silence before applause is nauseating.  It’s not even that I’m waiting on the applause.  It’s just knowing that I’m finished, that I can’t make it any better, that whatever I just did would have to represent my best.  But I’ll be honest, I don’t mind the applause…. 🙂

This contest could prove to be interesting.  While it’s my ego talking, I know that I’ll be better than some of the contestants.  Sorry, if that’s offensive but it’s true.  But boo on the people that are obviously better than me.  It’s a 12 week process so I might make it halfway through.  I’m just not looking forward to another disappointment.

Let’s just hope I get a job offer before I’m voted off,

Jo’van

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